The Changemaker’s Toolkit | Is Disagreement a Tool for Change?
I asked Shutterstock to show me images of disagreement, and this is the search result:
To my eyes, the majority of these images look like conflict or argument. Looking at the body language and facial expressions, most of these images are of face-offs, blame games, and breakdown. All of the reactions that enable the entrenched attitudes and polarisation that seem to be holding humanity back from collaborating, and democracies from functioning.
However, the image in the lower left hand corner stood out to me as something that better reflects what I think of as disagreement. The three people involved in the conversation clearly care about it. One person is speaking with passion. The other people are both paying rapt attention. One is leaning in with an expression of curiosity and the other is smiling. Are they even enjoying the disagreement?
Each and every one of us has a different perception of reality. Walk down the street or go out to dinner with a friend. You’ll walk away with different perceptions of the experience. In our personal lives, this often adds a delicious richness to our relationships. We like spending time with and rely on friends who see things differently to us. That friend who picks up on the hard-to-read social cues, or notices the first buds on the branches your big-picture brain omits.
Trust makes it easier to adapt an open attitude about difference amongst the people closest to us. But, what might be possible if our default position at work or in the social sphere was to explore the richness of perspective, even if it leads to disagreement, before jumping straight to conflict?
It would require us to lean into tension. And for most of us, that means stepping outside of our comfort zone. If we lean into the tension with an open attitude and open questions, we might learn something. If we lean into tension with an intent to identify where we agree, then we might be able to forge a path towards enabling that to happen. A well-managed disagreement should challenge everyone involved in the conversation. Yes, sometimes the outcome may be walking away from a collaboration or a partnership. But, even then, you may have learned something useful that expanded your perspective, your understanding, and your network - perhaps you’ve built an ally with whom you’ll be working in the future.
“Go where the tension is”, is a phrase a dear friend of mine who is a seasoned facilitator and quantitative researcher loves to use. Why? Think about a rubber band pulled as tense as possible. The only way beyond the tension is release - and when the band releases, it flies.
“A well-managed disagreement should challenge everyone involved in the conversation. ”
As innovators and changemakers, we’re signing up to be the folks who help find a way through tension and towards expansion. That requires a depth of skill and insight. It is far from easy, but we can develop tools to transform disagreement into acts of creativity.
That’s why the first step on the Together Culture Changemaker’s Toolkit journey is Develop an Innovation Mindset. In this course, we’ll help you develop your ability to move through ambiguity to enable something new to emerge. As part of an intimate co-learning team of innovators, you’ll explore the purpose of disagreement and how to reframe it as a process, you’ll identify your own disagreement tendencies and how to move beyond mental patterns that don’t serve your intent, and you’ll dissect a masterclass in productive debate to put ideas into practice.
Along the way, my wish for you is that you’ll find the courage to devote yourself wholeheartedly to your identity as a changemaker. The world needs you to go where the tension is and help us find our way through.
Looking forward to learning with you,
Heather
Find out more about Develop an Innovation Mindset.
Want to learn more? Join our Instagram Live Q+A on 8 January, 5 - 5.20pm (GMT) for a conversation with course facilitator Heather Thomas. Visit @togetherculture.cambridge in the Instagram app to set a reminder.
